Younger days are missed
Filled with energy and freedom
Exuberant about each day
Just happy to wake up
Suddenly wondering why
The house is always a wreck
There is always a bill to pay
Never a moment free for fun
Wishing there was "more"
Wanting to expand blurry horizons
Needing to fulfill my own expectations
Waiting for my queue...to fly
This is the original weblog for Shayne McClendon, erotica author and good girl. I am not afraid to talk about sex. I am not intimidated by my own sexuality or anyone else's. Push beyond your comfort zone. Find out what makes you tick - what makes your partner tick - and don't shy away from it. Be intimate, be dirty, be real...but ALWAYS practice safe sex and self-respect.
5.31.2011
5.22.2011
My Permission Is Revoked
Fuck being made to "settle"
I refuse to be satisfied with anything less, in any area of my life,
Than I deserve...dues have been paid
Fuck "calming down"
Why should I pretend that I am not angry?
I have worked hard for this fury and it will be given voice
Fuck the fact that I have a "pretty face"
To you a mediocre woman on the surface
While passion burns beneath my skin...constantly in heat
Fuck being "good enough"
I know my value as a woman, a member of the human race
I keep striving for better...and progress is being made
Fuck becoming a "non-person"
With no identity other than someone's mother or wife
Power is roaring back into my individuality
But most of all...fuck ME
For allowing this shit to happen in my life without fighting
No more sucker punches...I am hitting back!
I refuse to be satisfied with anything less, in any area of my life,
Than I deserve...dues have been paid
Fuck "calming down"
Why should I pretend that I am not angry?
I have worked hard for this fury and it will be given voice
Fuck the fact that I have a "pretty face"
To you a mediocre woman on the surface
While passion burns beneath my skin...constantly in heat
Fuck being "good enough"
I know my value as a woman, a member of the human race
I keep striving for better...and progress is being made
Fuck becoming a "non-person"
With no identity other than someone's mother or wife
Power is roaring back into my individuality
But most of all...fuck ME
For allowing this shit to happen in my life without fighting
No more sucker punches...I am hitting back!
5.21.2011
SHE
she taught me many things
when I was young
how to read and write my name
she instilled in me my annoying neatness
without which
many people would not recognize me
so many things she showed me
to remember
that quality was best
that art was deep and moving
books profound
the proper way to carry myself
the lessons she taught me
I know
will never be forgotten
I was a project
a toy
a pretty doll, a pet
I performed on cue
whenever
it was asked of me
through the hell of the first time
to my
ultimate rebellion at the last
she acted for many years as if
somehow
it were my fault
I believed her sometimes
but now
I know that was another lie
my crime was not a crime at all
being
a vibrant, happy child
not knowing how to stop the intrusions
and realizing
she did not want me to
how I laid my trust
in her
to make them go away
never understanding
there would
always be another to take his place
I love her still this monster
who took
everything I knew
so she wouldn't be
without a man
to pay for her life
she bid me earn her living
by the only
means I had
never stopping to consider
the destruction
her selfishness would cause
today we talk around
what happened
when I was a child
we both
pretend things are fine
nothing wrong at all
sometimes I think its better
to simply
leave the past alone
attempting to remember the good times
between the
horrors of the bad
but I know the truth
the past
still encroaches on my life
it affects my thoughts and feelings
how I react
to the people I love
I want to let it go
the darkness
and fear of my childhood
I would feel
so much more sane
if she'd only admit the truth
tell me she's sorry
so sorry
for how she made me live
so she
could keep her wealthy lifestyle
paid for with my innocence
I want to close the door
reopen another
let the past stay where it belongs
and find
a way to cleanse the filth
and at last forgive if not forget
when I was young
how to read and write my name
she instilled in me my annoying neatness
without which
many people would not recognize me
so many things she showed me
to remember
that quality was best
that art was deep and moving
books profound
the proper way to carry myself
the lessons she taught me
I know
will never be forgotten
I was a project
a toy
a pretty doll, a pet
I performed on cue
whenever
it was asked of me
through the hell of the first time
to my
ultimate rebellion at the last
she acted for many years as if
somehow
it were my fault
I believed her sometimes
but now
I know that was another lie
my crime was not a crime at all
being
a vibrant, happy child
not knowing how to stop the intrusions
and realizing
she did not want me to
how I laid my trust
in her
to make them go away
never understanding
there would
always be another to take his place
I love her still this monster
who took
everything I knew
so she wouldn't be
without a man
to pay for her life
she bid me earn her living
by the only
means I had
never stopping to consider
the destruction
her selfishness would cause
today we talk around
what happened
when I was a child
we both
pretend things are fine
nothing wrong at all
sometimes I think its better
to simply
leave the past alone
attempting to remember the good times
between the
horrors of the bad
but I know the truth
the past
still encroaches on my life
it affects my thoughts and feelings
how I react
to the people I love
I want to let it go
the darkness
and fear of my childhood
I would feel
so much more sane
if she'd only admit the truth
tell me she's sorry
so sorry
for how she made me live
so she
could keep her wealthy lifestyle
paid for with my innocence
I want to close the door
reopen another
let the past stay where it belongs
and find
a way to cleanse the filth
and at last forgive if not forget
5.19.2011
Fuck Me Like the Whore That I Am
I cannot get the image of you
The taste of you, out of my mind
The thought of your strong mouth
Latched to my nipple, sucking greedily
Five o'clock shadow scratching me
Sending shivers into my abdomen
Hard hands kneading into my flesh
Firmly coaxing sighs from me
The roughness of you...the strength
Taking what you want
Guiding my rhythm as I suck you
Knowing I will swallow every drop
Wanting you between my thighs
Fucking me hard and fast
Slamming your cock into me
Knowing that I like it just that way
I will take the pleasure, take the pain
Take your dick wherever you want it
Enjoy every moment with you
Like the whore that I am
The taste of you, out of my mind
The thought of your strong mouth
Latched to my nipple, sucking greedily
Five o'clock shadow scratching me
Sending shivers into my abdomen
Hard hands kneading into my flesh
Firmly coaxing sighs from me
The roughness of you...the strength
Taking what you want
Guiding my rhythm as I suck you
Knowing I will swallow every drop
Wanting you between my thighs
Fucking me hard and fast
Slamming your cock into me
Knowing that I like it just that way
I will take the pleasure, take the pain
Take your dick wherever you want it
Enjoy every moment with you
Like the whore that I am
5.11.2011
Come To Me
I want to hold you...kiss you...lick you
You should be with me now
Naked on my bed, tangled in my sheets
Absorbed in intense pleasure
When you cum I want to taste it
If you tremble, I want to feel it
I will stroke you until you recover
So that we can go again
Too many fantasies about you
Not enough hours in the day
I plan on fulfilling every desire
Granting every wish...every whim
Showing you what appreciation is
What devotion in bed can mean
What dedication to the craft is like
The things I will do to you...come to me
You should be with me now
Naked on my bed, tangled in my sheets
Absorbed in intense pleasure
When you cum I want to taste it
If you tremble, I want to feel it
I will stroke you until you recover
So that we can go again
Too many fantasies about you
Not enough hours in the day
I plan on fulfilling every desire
Granting every wish...every whim
Showing you what appreciation is
What devotion in bed can mean
What dedication to the craft is like
The things I will do to you...come to me
5.08.2011
Getting Ready for Work
Fresh from the shower, you come up behind me with a smile
I am getting ready for work, brushing my slightly damp hair
You run your palms up my sides, over my bra
Sighing in anticipation of getting me sweaty again
As you begin to massage my shoulders and neck
I let the brush slide to the dresser…our eyes locking in the mirror
Running your hands along my arms
Bringing them to rest on the front clasp that you love so much
As my breasts are freed from the cloth, they are captured by you
Pulling a taut nipple between thumb and forefinger
Hand still moving up and down my back, still watching me watch you
When you slip your fingers into my panties, my head drops to your shoulder
I am grinding back into you – feeling the hardness of your cock
A sense of loss when you release my nipple, but it is only to slip off my panties
You are kissing across my shoulder and up my neck
It is obvious how wet that makes me and you begin to lightly bite
You gather the pooling moisture from me and use it to slick yourself
A moment of tightness before access is granted to my ass
You moan with the snug fit…I moan when you begin to move inside me
There is a need in me to be closer and I rock back
You push me forward until I am resting on the dresser, still watching
The fingers caressing me move faster, my signal that you are getting close
Your pumping becomes more urgent and your face is strained with pleasure
I can feel your balls hit against me with each thrust, heightening my need
When I start to cum, you use one hand to clutch me to you more firmly
As my muscles clench in orgasm, you cannot hold it any longer
Filling me with warmth even as I cum for you, and only you
There is no need for words when you rest on my back
As your dick slowly softens inside me, you plant kisses along my spine
Wanting me to know how satisfied you are when you separate from me
You turn me around, tongue kissing me until I am breathless
Before you return to the shower, you lick your wet fingers and wink
It is going to be a beautiful day
I am getting ready for work, brushing my slightly damp hair
You run your palms up my sides, over my bra
Sighing in anticipation of getting me sweaty again
As you begin to massage my shoulders and neck
I let the brush slide to the dresser…our eyes locking in the mirror
Running your hands along my arms
Bringing them to rest on the front clasp that you love so much
As my breasts are freed from the cloth, they are captured by you
Pulling a taut nipple between thumb and forefinger
Hand still moving up and down my back, still watching me watch you
When you slip your fingers into my panties, my head drops to your shoulder
I am grinding back into you – feeling the hardness of your cock
A sense of loss when you release my nipple, but it is only to slip off my panties
You are kissing across my shoulder and up my neck
It is obvious how wet that makes me and you begin to lightly bite
You gather the pooling moisture from me and use it to slick yourself
A moment of tightness before access is granted to my ass
You moan with the snug fit…I moan when you begin to move inside me
There is a need in me to be closer and I rock back
You push me forward until I am resting on the dresser, still watching
The fingers caressing me move faster, my signal that you are getting close
Your pumping becomes more urgent and your face is strained with pleasure
I can feel your balls hit against me with each thrust, heightening my need
When I start to cum, you use one hand to clutch me to you more firmly
As my muscles clench in orgasm, you cannot hold it any longer
Filling me with warmth even as I cum for you, and only you
There is no need for words when you rest on my back
As your dick slowly softens inside me, you plant kisses along my spine
Wanting me to know how satisfied you are when you separate from me
You turn me around, tongue kissing me until I am breathless
Before you return to the shower, you lick your wet fingers and wink
It is going to be a beautiful day
5.07.2011
The Door
Is there a reason you want me here?
Am I anything more than a maid? A cook?
Do I hold value because of who I am?
Will there ever be a change between us?
I feel I am being used...
The woman inside is getting angry
I am convenient...a habit in the day-to-day
Taken for granted at every turn
Is it possible to think for yourself?
Must I guide each decision...each plan?
Are you an adult yet?
Is there a chance that you ever will be?
I want to be hopeful...think positive
But I am finding it hard to concentrate
The load I carry is constant and unbending
I feel suffocated by the weight
Can't you see what is happening?
Do you care to stop the cycle?
Will you do what must be done?
Do you mind if I walk out the door?
Am I anything more than a maid? A cook?
Do I hold value because of who I am?
Will there ever be a change between us?
I feel I am being used...
The woman inside is getting angry
I am convenient...a habit in the day-to-day
Taken for granted at every turn
Is it possible to think for yourself?
Must I guide each decision...each plan?
Are you an adult yet?
Is there a chance that you ever will be?
I want to be hopeful...think positive
But I am finding it hard to concentrate
The load I carry is constant and unbending
I feel suffocated by the weight
Can't you see what is happening?
Do you care to stop the cycle?
Will you do what must be done?
Do you mind if I walk out the door?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)